| Adapted from an online discussion. Dear Carolyn: Since my wife and I moved back to the area where we met, I now see that my mother-in-law is a closeted [glass bowl]. She comes off as friendly at first, but once you get to know her, you see the truth. If someone else has a different viewpoint from hers or does something differently, she’ll insult them behind their back, really mean stuff. She talks down to waitstaff, receptionists, etc., when she gets anything less than fawning service. She once scolded a waitress so loudly for not serving her breakfast at 11:30 a.m. despite their clear policy of ending breakfast at 10:30, the manager came over to explain the waitress wasn’t at fault. Mother-in-law then insulted the manager too and demanded a free meal. That kind of entitlement rubs me the wrong way, but my wife just shrugs it off saying it’s the way her mom is and she’s too old to change. What bothers me the most is how her mother acts like my daughter is the product of my wife and my wife alone. My daughter could be a clone of my little sister, but my mother-in-law insists she looks just like some great-aunt of hers no one has ever met. One relative recently met my sister and remarked on the resemblance, and later my mother-in-law said, within earshot, thank God the resemblance thing wasn’t true. I have been teaching my daughter some basic manners (please, thank you) that my wife and mother-in-law said she was too young for. When someone complimented my daughter’s manners, my mother-in-law explained how well my wife did at raising her. It’s a near daily thing. My wife thinks I’m getting too worked up over “small stuff,” but this isn’t small stuff to me. Am I blowing this out of proportion? — Worked Up |
