For non-Switch users, this summer will be a sordid, slop-filled affair. Not “slop” as in sloppy joes, “slop” as in Shrimp Jesus. “The likeness of the Christian figurehead fused with crustaceans started going viral on Facebook last year,” explains Parmy Olson. But now that Meta is working to fully automate its ads with AI, she says, “Shrimp Jesus might try to pitch you on a local seafood restaurant.” If the thought of your 67-year-old mother-in-law sending you an advertisement for Joe’s Crab Shack that’s endorsed by the Prince of Prawns himself doesn’t send goosebumps down your spine, perhaps Erin Lowry’s column on the burnout-to-slop pipeline will: “Against the crushing pressure of a never-ending to-do list, slop seems to calm the overworked brain and nervous system because it provides a stimulating and quick distraction,” she writes. All that bed rotting is a product of burnout, she argues: “We’ve become so accepting of brushing excessive exhaustion off as a necessary evil for achieving success that it doesn’t get enough blame.” If you wanna stop slop summer, first you gotta address your burnout. While Musk was busy breaking up with the White House, his car company got some ugly results from China: “Shipments from Tesla’s Shanghai factory fell by 15% in May compared with a year before, according to preliminary data from China’s Passenger Car Association. That marks eight straight months of declining output from Tesla’s single biggest electric vehicle factory, accounting for around 40% of its global capacity,” writes Liam Denning. “With the end of the second quarter approaching, and the sales figures emanating from China and Europe portending another set of weak earnings, it is perhaps little wonder that this narrative is crowded out by all manner of other things.” Remember when Manhattan office towers were cloaked in a disgusting blanket of orange smoke that had wafted down from Canada? That was TWO years ago this week, if you can believe it. And Mark Gongloff says another “huge cloud of the stuff has invaded the Lower 48, spoiling air quality from North Dakota to South Carolina — and, again, Chicago and New York. Some of it even crossed the Atlantic to Europe,” he writes. “It’s no fluke this has happened in two of the past three years. The heat from a relentlessly warming planet has made wildfires more frequent and intense (and weird) around the world.” It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to realize how bad that is for our health. Filing for bankruptcy is generally a bad sign, but for 23andMe, it had some advantages. — Matt Levine A hiring freeze that hurts the Bureau of Labor Statistics may cost Americans a lot more than it saves the government. — Jonathan Levin South Korea’s new president should tackle the roadblocks to renewables. — David Fickling Why is India talking to the Taliban? The militant group’s reintegration into regional politics was inevitable. — Mihir Sharma There is an alternative to the dollar — it’s the euro. — Paul J. Davies There is no world in which Keir Starmer meets all the commitments he’s made. — Rosa Prince Just because the Supreme Court tossed Mexico’s lawsuit against US gun manufacturers, doesn’t mean the US is blameless. — Stephen L. Carter How the Houthis rattled the US Navy. Where oh where did the engineers go? DC’s National Airport is closing on June 14. The Trump family is confused about crypto. The Birkin to end all Birkins. The chocolate purse everyone’s talking about. Noughties nostalgia is all the rage. Happy kitten season to all who celebrate. |