LAST WEEK'S BREAKTHROUGHS

In last week’s newsletter, I asked you to go do one thing you were worried about doing, no matter what others may think.

Caleb is translating his health worries into action:

“Not worried about others' perception but worried about a matter I've postponed for months: my health. I've struggled with respiratory issues (possible asthma, not sure) for a couple of years and never put any attention into healing because I couldn't afford it then or (now that I have health insurance) I immediately dread the amount of work that I think it will require or the amount of money that I think I will inevitably pay.

So I said, ‘You know what? Let's just try to see what's the deal with coverage, and specialists, and treatments, and blood work. If it turns out it is as expensive or stressful as I believe it will be, I'll just pull the emergency break, freeze this mess and try to live life to the best of my abilities. At least I'm not dying. And this doesn't interfere with my day to day so bad.’

So, I stopped worrying about the outcome and I am treating it like a work task. Can't share the outcome yet. I don't hope, and I don't despair either. If the situation gets overwhelming, I'll just say, ‘Cool, don't want this anymore, going back to my home, my job, my family, my friends and taking pictures of the sky’ (neat hobby by the way).”

Adante has been tackling his worries one at a time:

“Growing up, I never cared much about popularity. I cared more about doing the right thing. That mindset often made me unpopular, and there’s a price to pay for it—but it also set me free. Free from peer pressure, and free from the need to compete for acceptance. Even so, I still care deeply about my reputation—something far more valuable than popularity.

As I’ve grown older (and hopefully wiser), I’ve become more aware of the value I gain from the people around me. I’ve learned to avoid those who are constantly negative—they tend to drag you down and drown you in their pessimism. In both my personal life and in business, it’s better to surround yourself with people who add value. And sometimes, that value comes from simply learning through their mistakes and failures.

Learning not to worry, when to worry, or how to worry is an ongoing struggle and a daily practice in personal growth. It’s not about getting it right every time, but about being aware of where your energy goes and learning to handle worry in a healthier way.”

Finally, Slava shows it’s possible not to worry… even in the most horrible circumstances imaginable:

“Just a comment on: ‘Why worry?’

I found it funny, since I live in Ukraine and recently we got something very close to carpet bombing, which occasionally gets to be very close to my house.

Every other week you get real bombing, like 40+ drones and around the same amount of explosions. Daily—just one or two that you barely hear.

For the last couple of months, after a huge burnout because of constant stress for the last three years, I’ve asked the same question. Why worry if your apartment gets hit by the rocket or your car gets destroyed, if you survive or they’ll find you dead and naked.

There is no point to worry in the moment—it’s not helping, not getting you safer, you just keep running on the spot. Either do something or do not, but don’t get stuck in the moment because of worry—that works. Otherwise, save the energy, because you’ll need it later.

This I think is not really what you’re talking about, but at the same time it’s the same thing. Why worry, indeed. This idle worry doesn’t get us anywhere, it just drains the energy.

Better do something, something that you can—so you can see if it was worth worrying about or not. :)”

As always, send your breakthroughs by simply replying to this email. Let me know if you’d prefer to remain anonymous.

Until next week,

Mark Manson

#1 New York Times Bestselling Author
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