Reading these stories of bad first dates made me fully appreciate being off the dating market.

"Do you know all the memes about how horrible customer service jobs are? Now imagine you gotta have sex with all those idiots."

"If we can't impeach a president because 'it's not a realistic option' and 'he was already impeached twice,' then the system has failed ... "

This is the first I've heard of the bongo story, and I'm fascinated.

"That's not democracy, that's authoritarian blackmail."

"GET YOUR PAP SMEARS. I promise you, the treatment for cervical cancer is so much more invasive than a Pap."