Mikel Arteta’s latest wheeze

The use of psychological stratagems and pitchside or locker-room sabotage has long been employed by football managers trying to give their teams an edge over visiting rivals. Whether it’s placing the pegs too high or the seats too low, painting the walls an aggression-lowering shade of pink or deliberately moving the advertising hoardings to prevent long throws, there are apparently no stones conniving coaching staff will leave unturned if they think their team’s chances of winning may be improved by such shenanigans. Almost 40 years ago, Wimbledon’s Crazy Gang famously used to leave visitors to Plough Lane without any hot water, a plan that seemed stunning in its simplicity, until you realise – as Football Daily has just done after nearly 40 years – that footballers generally tend not to shower until after the game is over, rendering their attempt at disruption decidedly redundant.

A man who has previously attracted ridicule for hiring a team of pickpockets to pinch his players’ watches, phones and wallets during a team dinner to teach them the value of vigilance and focus, it ought to come as no surprise that Mikel Arteta has now hit upon the psychological wheeze of disrupting his own team’s preparations for matches as a way of keeping them on their toes. The Arsenal manager has revealed that he occasionally has dressing-room thermostats turned up to 11, delays meal and transport times, or has physio room massage beds “disappeared” to ensure Arsenal’s finest are prepared for any curveballs life might pitch their way. And while such half-baked amateur psychology will almost certainly provide more grist to the mill of Arteta haterz, if inducing mild anxiety in Declan Rice and Bukayo Saka over a toasty canteen or slightly late bus is all it takes to finally win a league title, then who are we to carp?

“I love those challenges,” parped Arteta. “I try to create them in pre-season. So when they happen, we already experience them and we already know. So, get to the stadium very late, change the routine as soon as the players have to do something else. Because when it happens, and it can happen, you can miss the flight, the train can be delayed, there’s so much traffic, and I don’t want the players, the staff as well, panicking.” Of course, our more astute reader will have already clocked that Arsenal’s flight to Naples this week was delayed by several hours, prompting the cancellation of their pre-match press duties.

While Arsenal’s was only one of several hundred flights from UK airports disrupted or cancelled due to an air traffic control “glitch”, it behoves Football Daily to point out there is no suggestion that a slightly weird 44-year-old from San Sebastián was responsible for you and your pals missing out on that eagerly anticipated lads’ trip to Benidorm. We also know that while stressed-out passengers in overcrowded departure lounges across the UK were effing, jeffing and generally losing their minds, the footballers of Arsenal were – due in no small part to Arteta’s mind games – presumably waiting in the business lounge to board their well-appointed jet in a state of carefully orchestrated zen.

“I quit and I’m not coming back” – Fenerbahce head coach Ismail Kartal announces his resignation after ⁠their 1-1 draw at home to Roma in Bigger Cup.

“Some ‌fans threw a bottle ‌at the coach’s head this evening during the game. He ‌is upset about it. I just spoke to [him]. He mentioned the bottle incident and he also complained about being under pressure … I am his senior, I told him to continue and that’s ​it. We are a family” – Fenerbahce president Aziz Yildrim suggests Kartal will be coming back after all.

Thankfully Noble Francis has now won a book (yesterday’s Football Daily letters) so has something else to do other than writing prize-winning, witty missives. This means the rest of us mere mortals have a chance of winning your letter o’ the day” – Martyn Shapter.

If you have any, send letters to the.boss@theguardian.com. Today’s letter o’ the day winner is … a rollover, so our final copy of The Mbappé Project by Philippe Auclair will be up for grabs on Monday. Copies are available in the Guardian Bookshop for you unlucky scribes. Terms and conditions for our competitions, when we run them, are here. 

As suggested by reader Peter Rehwaldt, the story and legacy of FDNY Soccer Club player Sergio Villanueva.

Manchester United have dished out a cold serving of reality to Sabah after a 4-0 beatdown at Old Trafford. “We started quite well and I didn’t feel we were shaking or scared,” declared their manager Valdas Dambrauskas. “But we will all go home thinking that we could do a little bit better.”

Jamal Musiala is back in action after a neurological condition caused him to collapse on the pitch during two Bayern pre-season friendlies, marking his return with the opener in their 5-0 thrashing of Bodø/Glimt. “Scoring – pure happiness,” he cooed. “I just want to perform well again … get back to my level step by step, playing with a sense of ease, joy, and fun on the pitch.”

And Como have marked their debut in the competition by inviting older fans to watch their 4-1 win over Leipzig. Club president Mirwan Suwarso and some directors gave away their own seats, allowing supporters born in 1950 or earlier to attend the sold-out game.

Morocco’s prime minister has hit out at his country’s top football official ⁠after the federation president boldly declared that the 2030 World Cup final will be played ⁠in Casablanca, despite ⁠Fifa ​not having made a decision yet. “Do not offer to host the big final game while we still have not discussed the matter with our allies, Spain and Portugal. There should ‌be some respect, brothers,” sniffed prime minister Aziz Akhannouch. “Stop using electoral ​promises to pull the rug out from under us. These are huge matters.”

The French Football Federation’s president says Gianni Infantino has “seriously damaged the image and the unity of football” after France pulled their support for the Fifa supremo’s re-election.

Enzo Maresca has backed Elliot Anderson’s assessment that Manchester City are the “kings of Manchester” as he prepares for his first derby in charge of the club. “It’s normal,” whooped Maresca.

Pedro Neto is the proud owner of a lucrative new Chelsea deal. Meanwhile, the club’s majority owners, Clearlake Capital, are closing in on an agreement to buy out Todd Boehly and Mark Walter in a deal that would see the pair make a profit on their investment, valuing the club at £5bn.

Luton have got the funk on after boss Jack Wilshere was sent off in their 2-1 League One defeat to Stevenage. “When you come [here], you have to be prepared to stand up to them and we did that, but obviously the game turned on a couple of incidents that really, at any level, shouldn’t happen,” sniffed assistant Chris Powell. “That’s not sour grapes … the game was decided by a couple of incidents that should have been dealt with a bit better by the officials.”

And Juan Mata won’t be returning to Melbourne Victory next season. “I loved every minute and so greatly enjoyed everything that we achieved last season, falling back in love with football at such a special place, in an amazing city that it was a privilege to call home,” he sighed.

Our Premier League top scorers pages is up and running, and you might be shocked to learn the picture isn’t solely Erling Haaland.